Friday, April 10, 2015

The Proper Goodnight

I am a super busy body and usually can't stop all the stuff I have going on at bedtime and I want to stay up and usually write all the amazing things going on in my head down on paper or computer.  My husband on the other hand gets tired and starts falling asleep usually while I'm trying to tell him all of these amazing things.  I hope you know I'm exaggerating here however my sister can attest to falling asleep during my nighttime rantings when we shared a room as little kids.  The problem is that I want to go to bed with my husband and give him hugs and all the loving kindness he deserves!  But if I try to go to bed I'm just left with thoughts running and running and I can't sleep.  Which we all know is a small form of torture.  So I came up with....

"The Proper Goodnight" 

...and we actually call it that...I ask him, "Are you ready for your proper goodnight!"

So here's how it works...

Husband goes to bed because he's tired or vice versa you may be the one that has to stick toothpicks in your eyes to try to stay awake so you can go to bed with your go to bed with him...not to sleep just to snuggle get some back rubs and the low down on how each other's day was and then snap I'm back up out of bed to finish all the crap that won't get out of my head!  (PS sometimes the snuggling helps and I'm ready and needing to sleep too)

Why this is important and how it's blessed our far?

*This gives us the chance to show each other we love each other in our own personal love language.  I'm not just talking about sex here but sex is a plus!

*It renews our bonds daily and keeps them strong so they don't fade.

*It gives us a chance to talk about any concerns or anything that's hurt our feelings.  ***general warning for this not talk about stuff that you know is going to get one or the other of you ticked off because you know neither of you will be sleeping after that***

*I feel more Loved and Fulfilled.

This has been something much easier for my husband and I to do with a more "normal" schedule but this is not always something that we can physically do due to work schedules.  My husbands police officer hours did not help the matter in the least.  Looking back I wish we would have made the effort even if it wasn't at night.  Instead of a proper goodnight try a proper good morning, or nighttime phone call, or get the point.  Plan it some other time if you aren't able to do it at bedtime.

Our relationship is number one and I sometimes loose the focus of that amidst kids, house, work, and other responsibilities.  I notice that when I do not spend time with my spouse it shows.  Continued undivided attention is necessary to a successful relationship.

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